“Well, that was a bad decision!” How many times have we all looked back on a situation and said that?
One of the most important factors impacting the quality of our lives is our ability to make good decisions. I have discovered over the course of my life that when things didn’t turn out as I planned or hoped, it was almost always due to the decisions I made (or failed to make). Occasionally, of course, circumstances beyond my control caused an outcome I didn’t desire, but most of my failures and disappointments have come about due to poor decision making.
Most poor decisions result from one of three causes:
- The inability to delay gratification and lack of self-discipline
- Making emotional decisions, acting on what we feel rather than facts and reason
- A decision based on fear.
When we lack the ability to delay gratification, we make choices like buying things we can’t afford, thus often going into debt unnecessarily. We may enter a relationship that we shouldn’t, decide to cheat on an exam, drive after drinking too much, do something unethical or illegal to obtain something we desire. A key component of positive outcomes and good decisions, and to being successful in life, is self-discipline and the ability to delay gratification.
Decisions based on emotions means we are letting our feelings override the facts and reason. The ability to understand and control one’s emotions is an important aspect of making the right decisions. This is often easier to say than to do, especially if we’ve developed the habit of letting our emotions take control. Avoiding emotional decision making requires a level of maturity where one can acknowledge an emotion but also realize that they do not need to act on that emotion. If we consider the potential consequences of our decisions, it will help us focus on facts and reason rather than emotions. M. Scott Peck put it this way,
“The quality of our lives is determined by the quality of our judgements”.
Good judgement and good decisions are based on facts and reason, rather than emotion.
Often, the fear of making a bad decision can cause us to avoid making any decision when one is required. President Theodore Roosevelt had this to say about decision making,
“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.”
Possibly the worst decision one can make when a decision is required is to avoid making one. It is normal to be concerned about the possibility of making a bad decision, and of course, the more important and consequential the decision, the more likely we are to be fearful of being wrong.
When I was growing up and stressing over some decision I needed to make, my mother would often ask me how important this decision would be in five years. This has proven to be a good way to look at a decision. How important is it in the long term? While there is always some risk in making any decision, is this one so critical and important that I should let fear keep me from making it?
Consider this story about the importance of good decision making and of realizing the consequences of our decisions. On September 26, 1983, a 44-year-old lieutenant colonel in the Soviet Air Defense Forces was the duty officer at a Soviet military installation where the Soviets monitored their early warning satellites over the United States. Warnings went off indicating that the U.S. had launched five missiles toward the Soviet Union. The lieutenant colonel had to make a decision. If he reported the warning to his supervisor, it was likely the Soviet Union would launch a counterattack and nuclear chaos would result. Knowing that time was of the essence, he was faced with a decision of wide-reaching consequences not only for himself but literally the entire world. He ultimately decided that it was likely a false alarm and that it would be unlikely that the U.S. would launch only 5 missiles at the Soviet Union. He decided not to notify his superiors. In the end, the alarm was, in fact, false and his decision prevented a nuclear war! He was praised for his calm but issued a reprimand.
Few of us will ever be faced with such dire consequences as the Soviet lieutenant colonel, but our decisions do have consequences, both immediate and long-term. Failure to obtain our goals rarely results from just one bad decision or poor choice. Typically, we fail to achieve our goals due to a repeated pattern of poor choices and bad decision making. Many of our problems are self-inflicted due to flawed decision making. One poor decision may not be that consequential, but over time, a pattern of faulty decision making has long-term consequences. Developing the skill of being a good decision maker is vitally important to our overall success in life.
If you want things to be different, you must start doing things differently. Beginning today, think more about the future ramifications of the choices and decisions you make, even the seemingly insignificant ones. Are these choices and decisions ones that will lead you to realizing your hopes, goals, and dreams? Will your decisions help you build the future you want for yourself, or are they more about ease and gratification in the here and now?
Consider how many of your problems in the past were a result of poor decision making. Do you go shopping for things you don’t need when you’re bored or upset? Have you put off going to the doctor for that health issue you’ve been experiencing? Do you skip regular oil changes on your car because you don’t want to take the time?
Our decisions have consequences. Start making decisions that are in your best interest, ones that will take you where you want to go in life. That’s what good decision making is all about.
Kent Shafer 